When women get sad they often get sadder than men do; when men get mad, they often get madder than women do ——> when it comes to time like such, men should learn to comfort women and women should learn to accomodate men~
shar's coming!
ooooo yea
thats right
i think the title is self-explanatory
you better not frown you better not cry sharmica is coming to town..lalalalala~ lol im trying to steal that song from christmas..
she’ll be here this friday~~~ yayeee~~
another secret
VA ZZ BV GT ZI AA GZ GL CA VF GC FC VF UU WV PB FN AJ EG UC ZF JJ GR CY YC RG JJ FZ CU GE JA NF BP VW UU FV CF CG FV AC LG ZG AA IZ TG VB F ZZ AV
the code itself gives a hint..
but the code itself is also misleading..
if anyone guesses this right, there will be a price (Y)
my biggest secret
26 14 11 21 20 11 22 11 24 25 21 20 3 14 21 15 14 7 2 11 7 9 24 1 25 14 21 20 14 7 26 11 25 19 11
this is one of my biggest secrets, but its in code..
if anyone cracked it, msg me =P
phew
phew
phew
phew
phew
phew
phew
i realized that all i wanted is for someone who knows us both to tell me that its ok.. and finalllllly someone did.. so now im back to normal susan! hurray!
无病呻吟
maybe im being too sensitive, but i seriously seriously counted how many times i’ve seen couples being kissy and huggie today, and the number is way more than how many ppl i usually see…
i dunno how i feel when i see couples, but its not the kind of feeling i used to get when i was still with jon..
i feel so empty and insecure for some odd reason.. i mean it doesnt mean being in a relationship fulfills me, but it certainly makes me feel like i have someone who will be there for me no matter what..
tho im not regretting, the constant thought of breaking up is not easy kept on crawling into my skin..
maybe this is what a break up feels like afterall.. im just 无病呻吟
Happy Valentines Day^^
see.. unlike lobby i actually post this on the correct date LOL
anyhow.. check it out!
even tho i have psych midterm tomoro and i havent read a single page yet.. i still spent 4 hours making this wonderful picture mwahahahaha.. its the power of valentines day i tell ya..
lol tho i doubt jons gonna ever take a peek at my blog.. im still saying happy valentines day here.. not jsut to him but to everyone^^ cuz im just that nice and THAT sweet LOL…
the importance of knowing what you dont know
i realized that knowing what you dont know is a lot better than assuming you already knew everything.. not just because your attitude reveals the humbleness that lies within you, it also keeps you grounded as you move on in life.. and best of all, you are in control of what you do or do not know since you know exactly what you dont, reversely you know exactly what you do know..
on the other side of the speculum, assuming you already knew everything not only will lead you to the falsehood of role playing (since no one knows everything, unless you are the god), it will also drag you down as you progress.. what im trying to say is, cockiness will only bring you to a downfall, a very heavily weighted and never-ending downfall, unless you come to an epiphany and realize what you have not instead of what have you done..
end..
friendship
for some, friendship is the exchange of goods and benefits; for others it is more of an exchange of accompaniment..
though i wouldnt necessarily concur with the latter, i do pity those who treat their friends as business targets..
i wonder, how would one define companionship without using the word “exchange”?.. it depresses me to think that something we normally value so much is in any form of trading system..
when i help others, i dont expect anything in return.. so i ask myself, why would i choose to help others? the reason seems to be so simple and even i cannot understand the nature of this answer.. it is merely because i like to see the smile on their face or the satisfied expression or any indication that shows i’ve made a difference in the other persons matter.. sometimes the help is so effortless that i wouldnt even realize that i made a difference, but perhaps i am used to behave in such way and receive such reflections to the extent that this process is common to me..
if i must, then the exchange i am proceeding would be that i often expect the “fuzzy warm feeling”.. how is this different than receiving factual goods or benefits? i dont think there is to be honest.. they all serve the same purpose, to make ourselves feel satisfied and thinking that it is a worthwhile experience.. so does that mean friendship has to be defined in such way then? that it is a form of exchange? and the trade is usually based on personal preference on trivial matters? well the trivial matter can then be defined as good or evil..
for the case of good it would be harmless such as accompaniment; though for the case of evil it varies.. but the key of something that serves evil purposes would be that it has the potential to hurt others or performs wrongful acts..
now i ask myself, what kind of friends would i consider as friends? the kind that lasts long or the kind whos truthful to me? there would have to be a definition for long lasting friends and the level of truthfulness, which im not even sure about yet since i have only experienced eighteen years of my life and only encountered people from three areas on this globe.. but i do want to say though, that if i can choose and if i can differentiate, then i wouldnt want to choose a friend who uses me as a tool or expects something in return that serves evil purposes every time they help me out..
it is hard though, to identify such people, especially for me, because i treat them equally as others and their personal preferences cannot be revealed if i treat them equally as others.. tough luck i suppose.. it is not up to me to judge people and treat them differently according to any sort of preference because of the fact that i am not god.. if i cant determine how evil/good someone is, i shall give them the same amount of respect i give to others around me.. and that is how i value everyone.. and that is how i value friends..
i cant help it
i hope i can make everyone around me happy, but i cant
i hope i can take care of my friends, but i cant
i hope i can answer all the questions you ask me for, but i cant
i hope i can fulfill all ur wishes, but i cant
i hope i can … but i cant do anything right..
u know.. i know what ur looking for, i know exactly what you want.. but…
sometimes i know if i say yes it’ll make u happy, so i said yes.. but it just made things even more complicated and u began to hate me for what i’ve said..
sometimes i know if i say yes to u then i’ll make others upset, so i said no.. but it made u upset and i feel awefully depressed for doing so..
sometimes i know no matter what i say it will hurt u anyway.. so i remain silence and it creates this enormous gap between us that just makes me want to scream.. out loud..
i dont know what to do, i dont know how to solve this problem, so i leave it for now and went back to it later, but then i realized how stupid i was for leaving it behind because now it turned into this disgustingly messy confusion thats even worse than before..
argh..
